{Inside: 5 questions to ask when decluttering gets tough}
Letting go is hard. There is no other way to slice it. I could tell you that with practice, it gets easier. And that is actually true. But the reality is that saying goodbye to anything can feel like a loss.
At least initially.
Over time, when you give the decluttering process a real chance, something shifts. You begin to see that what felt like loss was actually a necessary trade for what you gain. Letting go creates more time, more mental clarity, and more physical space.
You gain more of what truly matters when you release what doesn’t.
You feel this most clearly when you start with the easier things – items with little emotional weight like extra linens, unused kitchen gadgets, things that are old, broken, or forgotten. Reducing this kind of excess lightens your space almost immediately. The “too much” that once took up valuable room no longer weighs on you.
You also feel the gain when you face the harder categories that carry a sentimental bent. These are more layered, and letting go often requires a deeper look into the thought patterns that create clutter and keep it in place.
Whether you’re decluttering the easy stuff or the emotionally charged items, the struggle is real. And when decluttering gets tough, it helps to pause and ask yourself better questions.
Five questions to ask when decluttering gets tough
1. How do I want to feel in my home?
How you want to feel should be the driving force behind why you’re letting go in the first place. Get clear on that feeling, then ask whether the item in question supports it—or detracts from it.
2. Would I buy this again?
Whether you purchased the item yourself or received it as a gift, ask: if I saw this in a store today, would I buy it again? If the answer is no, that’s important information.
3. Who will sort through my belongings when I’m gone—and what can I do now to lessen that burden?
This isn’t a comfortable question, but it’s an honest one. When we hold onto things without purpose or intention, we often leave the work of letting go to someone else—usually someone we love. You don’t have to get rid of everything, but you do get to decide what truly deserves a place in your life now.
4. Do I need this—or am I attached to the memory it represents?
If something holds a meaningful memory and is useful or loved, that’s a win. But if the item serves no purpose beyond the memory, it – unlike the memory itself – is clutter. As Courtney Carver says, “Your heart doesn’t want to hold on to stuff. All it wants is love.”
Letting go of an object does not erase the experience you had.
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