It is 2020 and for me it is the year of easing into everything – with as much grace and calm as I can muster. I’ve made it a goal mostly because I can see aspects of my life that are anything but graceful, and calm. I am seeing more clearly not just the need to slow down. But how to do it in a way that trumps simply uttering the words for cliche’ purposes.
Saying, I need to slow down, and actually doing it, are two different things.
Part of what I am doing to ease in, to be present and productive is to recognize what is a distraction and what is an opportunity. This isn’t hard work. But it does take a willingness to pay attention to what you see, and make a change for the better.
I don’t have to give it too much thought to realize my biggest distraction is social media. And it’s not in the way you might think. A year ago I decided to shut off all personal Facebook and Instagram notifications on my phone. And I vowed to end mindless scrolling through those pages.
The result for me was uplifting, and I have to say life-changing.
I felt so wonderful and light. All the comparison I was doing, sometimes subconsciously, disappeared. I felt better about myself in a way. Oh, and time – I seem to have more of it! It feels a little crazy to say that but it shows how much of a strong hold social media had on me! And I think it does for many others.
I let it all go and when I did gone was the feeling like I had to keep up with everyone else. Gone was that nagging, slight-but-powerful feeling of not being good enough. And I think we all experience those feelings at some level when it comes to social media. No, it is not the goal of it, but I think it is an unfortunate result.
I am finding keeping up with my business social media page to be a similar distraction.
This is not a page that leaves me feeling like I need to keep up with the Jones’s. But keeping up with posting as consistently as I have been offers a diversion in my day-to-day. One that as of late I have not welcomed. It has been rare, actually, that I have looked forward to spending hours over the course of a week in front of my computer writing short snippets about living simply and well, and organized.
It’s not that I don’t love writing about that. That is exactly what I love writing about! But in the form of social media, where I don’t feel I am grabbing attention long enough, or able to make more of an impact, it feels like a distraction – for me and for you.
Importantly, it is the kind of distraction that keeps me from writing the kinds of things that will grab attention, force the reader to slow down and contemplate. The marketing needs of social media (to consistently post) pull me from writing my book, blog posts, and a really good online program to teach people about how to create a lighter life, and why it is integral to living your best life.
Social media also pulls you into distraction, away from the ability to slow down.
And in a way, I contribute to that. Which is ironic. The vehicle for which I post messages about slowing down can actually pull you in and do the exact opposite. That is, of course, not my goal.
But I am limited in how I can prevent you from being pulled in if I solely rely on social media. I am not there to hold your hand or give you a little love tap to remind you to stop scrolling and start living in your own life. You have to create those limits for yourself, the limits that give you a chance to breathe, differently. The ones that help you see what else there is outside of social media, or instead of it.
You need to give yourself that tap, that reminder to slow down, come back to the present, to stop the scrolling death trap, to be aware of the interruption it poses to you actually living your life.
You need to be aware of the distractions. And so, perhaps easing out, so you can slow down, is something to consider.
Look, I am not getting off for good. And I’m not suggesting you need to either. I’ll still be posting, just a lot less. I see some value in social media, especially my growing following on Facebook. I see the value in the connections and information that is passed along. And there is a time and a place for using it so it is a benefit, not a detriment. Sometimes, that comes in the form of limiting use; sometimes it comes from taking a little vacation from all use – the kind of vacation that reminds you what is important.
A vacation that allows you to see whether something like social media really gives you more. Or it just takes more from you.
If you ask yourself, What does social media give me? I wonder what the answer would be. What do you get? Any real fulfillment, any invaluable self worth? Do you get more time, or a feeling of more productivity?
If the answers are no, maybe it is time to ease out, to slow down, to put big boundaries around using social media.
Maybe, just maybe, finding ways not through social media to slow down is a lot more life-affirming. Perhaps you would get more of what you need from things like monthly meetings with friends, in person. Or reading – an actual book – or writing a letter.
And if inspiration is what you are looking for, or if learning about how to live life lighter, simpler is what you need, find it in a blog like this, or even an email Newsletter (shameless plug!). You get just what you need, in a measured, unhurried way. And that is important. They both take time to read, which is where the blessing is because they are a actually forcing you to slow down.
A blog, or Newsletter, or book you are reading is a single point of focus, not a barrage of hundreds of different stories and pictures pulling at your brain for attention.
If you are reading this blog from a link you found on social media, I am grateful. Obviously. I don’t wish for you to end your relationship with Facebook, but I do want you to question it. If your reason for holding tight to the relationship is more about boredom or lack of self worth, isn’t easing out something to consider? Especially if there is a chance you can and will get so much more without so much of it?
I want you to find yourself and your inspiration from and with others who bring you up, not hold you down. Or bleed dry your valuable time and attention span. And I want to be a person who gives you that inspiration just from the quieter corners of my world like my blog or Newsletter.
I am setting those necessary boundaries around social media for myself. I am easing out and yes, I challenge you to consider it, too. Simply put, less social media = more of everything else. For us both.
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I’d love for you to join my community by subscribing to my Newsletter. It’s a quick, weekly email that allows me to pop into your inbox, and allows you to decide when you want to open up that inspiration and information-laden email. You get to slow down. We get to connect. It’s a win-win for us both. For subscribing you’ll receive my Fundamental Facts on Organizing – my best curated tips on how to live life light, and organized! Yours, for free, when you subscribe. And also free for your friend if s/he subscribes. {wink, wink}. So feel free to share away! Thank you, and thank you.
Oh, and one more thing: if you want to receive in your email inbox new blog posts I publish instead of having to scroll on Facebook to maybe catch them being posted (which WordPress does for me automatically incidentally), all you have to do is make a comment and check the box at the end that says “Notify me of new posts by email”. Done and done! Easy breezy.
